Horrorscope

(October 1, 2010 – October 14, 2010)

Hello Friends! I am having a very bad case of potato conjunctivitis and so will not be able to do potato ball gazing. But instead my little kid of five will do it. Worried? Oh don’t be. She does it fine. After all potato ball gazing runs in our genes, but ..err there is a small problem, she can only express in nursery rhymes. Don’t worry. I will do the deciphering. I can do that without stressing my eyes, its another matter that it will stress my remainder of brains. Bheja fry!

Aries:- Pull a Cracker, pull a Cracker,
Till it bangs.Pull a Cracker, pull a cracker
Bang
Gosh these are becoming a bit cryptic now. Hmm Yes! You will have to try harder to make things happen to get things done bang on target.

Taurus- Jump down turn around
Pick a bale of cotton
Jump down turn around
Pick a bale a day
Jump down turn around
Pick a bale of cotton
Jump down turn around
Pick a bale a day
Well time to shed your laid back attitude and charge ahead full gear, to profit from new ventures or else you will be left with just that- cotton bales

Gemini- A-tisket, a-tasket,
A brown and yellow basket;
I sent a letter to my love
And on the way I dropped it.
I dropped it, I dropped it.
Yes on the way I dropped it;
A little girlie picked it up
And put it in her pocket.
She was truckin’ on down the avenue
With not a single thing to do;
She went peck, peck, peckin’ all around,
When she spied it on the ground

She took it, she took it,
The letter from my basket;
And if she doesn’t bring it back
I think that I will die’

Ahem ahem! she means there will be misdirected messages, misplaced issues- in other words heart breaking confusions.

Cancer – I’m forever blowing bubbles,
Pretty bubbles in the air,
They fly so high,
Nearly reach the sky,
Then like my dreams
They fade and die.
Fortune’s always hiding,
I’ve looked everywhere,
I’m forever blowing bubbles,
Pretty bubbles in the air.

Dreaming is not always the best and only course of action, to convert your dreams in to reality. Time to act or you know what the verse says. Hmmm

Leo- Hop a little, jump a little, One, two, three;
Run a little, skip a little, tap, tap on one knee;
Bend a little stretch a little, nod your head;
Yawn a little, sleep a little, in your bed.

So regular, so uniform, that completing reading this horrorscope will seem more adventurous than your fortnight.

Virgo- Ladybird, Ladybird, fly away home.
Your house is on fire and your children all gone;
All except one, and that’s little Ann.
And she has crept under the warming pan.

Ladybird, Ladybird, fly away home.
Your house is on fire and your children all gone;
All except one, and that’s little Ann.
And she has crept under the warming pan.
And she has crept under the warming pan.

Hmm. Do not wait for your ass to be on fire to get things done or it might be too late. Sorry to put it that way, but my eyes are hurting me a little bit.

Libra – Dance to your daddy,
My bonnie laddy,
Dance to your daddy,
My bonnie lamb.
You shall get a fishy,
In a little dishy,
You shall have a fishy,
When the boat comes in.
You shall get a coatie,
And a pair of breekies,
And you’ll get an eggy,
And a bit of ham.

Well this one is easy, she means that you will have all you want if you can butter up the right persons at the right time.

Scorpion – Hark! Hark! The dogs do bark,
The beggers are coming to town.
Some in rags, and some in tags,
And one in a velvet gown

It is pretty obvious that you will be having visitors many. Favour seekers a many, but favor granters too less. So less that, it will turn you into a favor seeker instead.

Sagittarius- Riddle me, riddle me, ree;
A little man in a tree;
A stick in his hand,
A stone in his throat,
If you tell me this riddle
I’ll give you a groat.

Hmm This is no cryptic message. Nothing makes sense to you and nothing you want to make sense is making sense to anybody. Made sense?

Capricorn- A Sailor went to sea, sea, sea,
To see what he could see, see, see,
And all that he could see, see, see,
Was the bottom of the deep blue sea, sea, sea.

Err…- she means that it will be a fortnight where you will be totally lost, at sea.

Aquarius- Shall l sing? says the Lark,
Shall l bloom? says the Flower;
Shall l come? says the Sun,
Or shall l? says the Shower.

Sing your song, pretty Bird,
Roses, bloom for an hour;
Shine on, dearest Sun;
Go away, naughty Shower.

Too much of a politically correct demeanor! Spontaneity will bring better results

Pisces- Find a pin and pick it up,
All day long you’ll have good luck.
Find a pin and let it lay,
All your luck will pass away

That definitely means you will have mixed luck throughout the fortnight. Keep track of things, you never know, you might get somebody’s heart. Now won’t that be great?

Well those were the predictions. Phew! somehow managed to complete with full cooperation of junior. But one advise, try to keep old rotten potatoes away from eyes. Harmful , very harmful!

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